How does The Gadfly know this?
C'mon ... really?
That's the best story he could come up with?
The wife's feelings?
Good god he's not even a competent bullshitter, which is something The Gadfly has always believed, obviously undeserved, that Drumpf was actually accomplished at. But get a load of this - purportedly this is an excerpt from former FBI Director James Comey's memoirs which are being published in book form on Monday:
President Trump wanted James Comey to investigate the infamous “pee tape” allegations — to reassure Melania that he hadn’t actually paid Russian hookers to urinate on a hotel bed, the former FBI chief claims in his upcoming book.
“He brought up what he called the ‘golden showers thing’ … adding that it bothered him if there was ‘even a one percent chance’ his wife, Melania, thought it was true,” Comey writes in “A Higher Loyalty: Truth, Lies, and Leadership,” a copy of which was obtained by The Post.
“He just rolled on, unprompted, explaining why it couldn’t possibly be true, ending by saying he was thinking of asking me to investigate the allegation to prove it was a lie. I said it was up to him.”
https://nypost.com/2018/04/12/comey-trump-asked-me-to-investigate-pee-tape-to-reassure-melania/
Let's review shall wee-wee?...
So, out of the blue, in an oval office setting, Drumpf starts blubbering to Comey about that darn, fake, Russian pee-pee tape dossier rumor thingy that he himself has consistently and publicly claimed never happened, but now that he's the King, it's suddenly bothering him because he just cannot suffer the thought that his poor, poor, dear, innocent Queen, err... wife Melania, might be harboring even a fraction of one percentage point of agonizing, heart-wrenching, soul-crushing doubt as to the devout fidelity of her Special Golden Man -- his fidelity for mercy's sake! -- oh the humanity!! -- and the conversation thus ends with Drumpf telling Comey that he might want him to "investigate" to prove the rumor is a lie - you know - to prove Donald Trump is not a liar . . . .
Jeebus Fuck -- where to began dissecting this pile of weasel-dee-gobble-speak.
First -- FUCKING LOL!!! Can you believe that smug bastard actually attempted to convince James Comey that he was so distraught over the thought that his beloved, cherished, adored spouse might possess even a 1% chance of suspicion as to her daahhling' husband's choice of sexual fetishes and so to assuage the anguished heart of his beloved betrothed, it just might be necessary that the FBI, for duty and for country, "investigate" the insidious pee-pee rumor and prove to the world that it is a lie and that Donald Trump is a virtuous leader --- well folks, The Gadfly has been on this planet for 56 years and fairly closely observing American politics for about 25 of those years. Quite frankly --- that is probably the most goddamn, mind-numbing and comically grotesque thing The Gadfly has ever heard of. It is also, hands down, the most hilarious thing that The Gadfly has yet heard amidst all of the fucking drama and chaos that has plagued our nation from the *election of this banana Republican nitwit of a *pResident.
Un-fucking-believable.
More importantly than poor Melania's synthetic crisis of matrimonial faith though, is just how utterly presumptuous and delusional this arrogant cocksucker Trump truly is - to be of the belief that his mere presence, should he so deem it, commands his underlings to play the role of "fixer" for his fucking personal behavioral "situations". That is exactly how Drumpf viewed Comey in the context of that conversation. For all intent and purpose Drumpf was basically telling Comey, "hey dude, you work for me now -- or you don't -- capish? - now go dispose of that dead hooker in the trunk of my limo -- bada-bing, bada boom."
And as would be expected from someone of Comey's reputable character and professional integrity, he proceeded to inform his boss, *pResident Donald John Trump, to, in no uncertain terms, go fuck himself.
And so now we get a another fascinating book to add to the collection of the ever faster growing pile of other fascinating books, all containing the unthinkable, drive-by accounts of life here in the United States of America, circa 2018.
And that dear readers, is how The Gadfly conclusively came to the conclusive conclusion that the Russian produced Drumpf pee-pee tape is undoubtedly the real deal.
Halle-motherfucking-lujah!
----TFg
*(the 'g' in The Gadfly's sign off moniker, as seen above, is to remain lower-case until the day President Very Stable Genius is vanquished - thank you for your understanding)
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